1. Trying to use my car key fob to make the elevator arrive.
  2. The fact that I typed “make the elevator come” but then thought that sounded dirty and technologically unlikely so changed it to “arrive.”
  3. Dialing my remote and putting it to my ear before realizing my remote and the person I was trying to call are no longer on speaking terms.
  4. Pointing the phone at the TV to change channels. There’s an app for that, but I didn’t download it because it was just entirely too practical.
  5. Dropping my landline phone in my coffee and using a paintbrush and blowdryer to try to save its tinny life. (This, of course, did not work.)
  6. Typos. Oh so many typos. Typos like little minions trying to redecorate an evil lair. Nothing new here with the typos. But lately I see them, recognize they are indeed typos, but it seems too complicated to fix them.
  7. Sarah Palin said something that made sense to me.
  8. Googling Sarah Palin to make sure I spelled her name right because it suddenly looked just weird felt perfectly normal.
  9. I now have three large bottles of the same shampoo, despite making two trips to the grocery store specifically for the conditioner that goes with that shampoo. Then, today, after typing this, telling this story to my roommate, going out to get the conditioner and forgetting it. (No problem, though, since I have to go get a fricking new phone anyway.)

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6 Responses
  1. typos are the debil

    I spent a full day out and about, came home, undressed and discovered I’d put on two bras

  2. Melissa says:

    Awesome! Thank you! I felt like such a tool after my 13.5 h Monday shift:
    I escaped by 23:30 but then a) accidentally took the hospital phone home with me, b) forgot to go to my doctor’s appointment the next morning, and c) forgot to shower. Oops.

    Now I know I’m not alone…

  3. dana says:

    loving your hair, whether you have conditioner or not! I just found my tv remote in the fridge, so I’m with you…

  4. Des says:

    Oh my-this is hysterical!
    I think you clearly must be getting writing done– that’s where your brain is–

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Cindie Geddes

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