Sometimes my brain gets hold of a knot and jiggles and plays with it until it unwinds into revelation. Sometimes I just end up with more knots. Sometimes my brain just gets bored and I fall asleep. These are some things that are knotting up my brain right now.

  1. The fact that my ankle still hurts makes me feel like a big baby.
  2. The fact that I keep having surgeries every year is starting to really piss me off.
  3. If I just stopped seeing doctors would I be a tough chick or an embarrassing cautionary tale?
  4. I know people who disagree with me on healthcare reform, global climate change and/or gay marriage think I’m stupid or mean (or evil). This would upset me if I didn’t have the same kneejerk reaction to them (except the evil part).
  5. I need to learn to be less judgmental.
  6. At what point is it OK to just say, “She started it!” and stop trying so damn hard to be civil?
  7. I don’t like the feel of paper, and the smell of old books doesn’t charm me as I think it should. This feels like a personal failing of huge proportions.
  8. When does tenacity turn pathetic?
  9. I love to write, so why don’t I do it more often?
Category: 9, Musings  Tags:
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5 Responses
  1. why did you stop at nine?

  2. wolfgang says:

    i don’t remember seeing this one! And I liked it.

    I think that we all have a lot of things that wind up around us in our brains, pushing us into a lot of scattered directions, but the other day while musing on this I came to a brilliant revelation (yes, I do have them every so often), and that was “That’s what life is.” Life isn’t accomplishing everything and blowing up mountains with our amazing inventions. Life isn’t something where all of our dreams come into fruition or all of the things we want to say get said, or the things we want to seek out are found. Life is a big beehive. An alice-in-wonderland tunnel, and while we can flip through every thing, consider it all, we can only do a certain few. And that’s not a bad thing. I think it makes the things we get done and all the more powerful because they were the things that WE chose. And those things are the ones that mattered the most. Whether it is writing today. Or if it’s saying something honest and sticking by it. Whether or not it’s watching something that taught you something or broadened your ideals. Or if it’s eating something you like. Or remembering a story that you love because you lived it and it’s yours.

    And I love lists. I make them all the time, and I think it’s healthy and I think that it’s a good way to sit down and be able to keep track of all the alice-in-wonderland tunnel milieu. But just remember: even making a list is an accomplishment. Because everything you do is aiding you in some way to get you ready for those really big things you know you’ll get to eventually. You’re just not tall enough to reach the shelf without building a ladder first.

    Just my thoughts on this subject. 🙂

  3. Rita says:

    So #6 – you don’t do that??? I think we all need to be 3 every now & then!

  4. Robert says:

    1: If it hurts, it hurts. Listen to your body.
    2: Would you still be here if we had 1800’s medical technology?
    3: Cautionary tale.
    4: Me too.
    5: And yet you still have all those friends from point 4.
    6: You only have yourself to answer to on this.
    7: I wouldn’t call it a failing, but I love the feel of paper and the smell of old books.
    8: Ask a Tea Party member.
    9: Please forward the solution to me when you find it.

  5. Des says:

    Welcome back! I’ve missed your musings, and these sound perfect for lakeside with a bottle of Basil’s. Also, I think judgment is underrated!

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Cindie Geddes

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